Dear ex…
It hurts to know that the dreams we created for a happy forever turns to mere memories and destroyed like sinking sand. You promised to hold my hand to forevermore but you lost me on this journey.
Do you remember how we walked the streets of that industry on a hot afternoon seeing nobody but us? We played, created scenes from movies, ran, played and took pictures forgetting the cars passing by and the people around because no one was existent but you and I.
I do hope you remember our memories with a smile especially the times I lay on your chest and we talked like people holding their fate in their hands. What about the times you deny me access to holding your hands as a way of punishing me knowing how much I complimented them for being soft. That reminds me of mom, how is she? Hope she’s doing well? I miss her, I miss how she smiles at me telling me to check you in your room. She warned you never to think of letting me go, she loved my profession, soul and size. I know she still ask of me if only I know what your response will be.
Our journey to and from town taking pictures and getting warned by the keke driver to be careful so your phone doesn’t get snatched and we laugh.
Bread, Chapman and sardine still remain my favourite, it was what we used to seal our togetherness. Prayer and encouragements were what bonded us. You always remind me of how much God loves me and will never forsake me, we prayed, cried, smiled and danced together. What happened to times when you praised my cooking and smile when I get shy. You loved my food as much as I wanted to get a taste of your yogurt but never got to.
That night still remain my favourite, one thing led to another and you are forever crested in my heart, everything was pure, the pain more of pleasure and the kisses pure honey.
Like every relationship, we had our difficult times but we worked it out because of how much it meant to us, so why did you leave?
I got comfortable in the assurance and promises you made never to leave.
You said your love was here to stay but the messaged you sent made it a lie, it was words but scribbled in a way that broke me, I was mute, hoping it was a lie, it shattered me, you promised to never hurt but you did, you said you will never leave a tear on my cheeks but you made me cry. For days turned to months and that pain still hurts. Yes the pain still hurts because I cried myself to sleep on countless times, left to choose either to hate you or let you be. Why? Is the answer I am yet to get, and I still wonder if I am still that special one, was everything a lie? Did you fall out of love or you only used me to get over your heartbreak. I begged, I pleaded I went ill but you were nonexistent.
What do I do when I remember the times we spent together? Should I cry? Smile? Or get angry? We had forever to walk to, there is nothing I could do now, and it strikes like a thunder and makes me wonder why it’s taking me this long to heal? My sleep, talks, thoughts and smell brings you back. I’ve tried to forget you but I cant, your voice still rings in my brain, maybe I just wasn’t what you wanted. It hurts to know you have moved on but I keep wondering if you really are happy. I promised to stay away but I failed and still call you, I have forgotten what you look like and still wonder what will happen when we meet again. You should know that I love you and I pray this memory fades away
I miss you, I miss us but I guess it’s time I move on; just know that I am faithful to the time you meant everything to me. I have your back and will be right beside you in everything that you do and when you need saving just like Chike I will come running to you.
And if you ever get to see this then know it’s from my heart.
Yours love….
(please drop a note for your ex here
WRITTEN BY: EMPRESS Delia
graphics by: billionaire impression
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